Have you ever felt that moment when a relationship has changed? That one event, email or phone call that flipped a switch somewhere in how you approach the other person? Could you pinpoint exactly when it happened?
Right now, I can.
I could tell you down to the very text message when a friendship recently changed. When everything was fun and interesting then suddenly took a spiraling turn to awkward and empty.
Do you acknowledge it? Do you let things carry on naturally? Do you try to rewind and repair the damage?
Let me put this more clearly. I recently started talking to an acquaintance more often and we were trying to do the whole "let's know each other more" thing. It was all going well until he asked a question of me that I knew he wouldn't want the honest answer for. But I gave the honest answer. We're 'friends' in the most basic sense, anything more would not be possible. But he already knew that. And that's when the switch got flipped. What was up, now was going down. What was casual, now became oddly serious. The conversation came to an unusually abrupt end. I could feel the switch. I knew things were different. I didn't say it, but I knew it was there. Trying to save face, I emailed him saying that it was nice to talk and I would speak to him again in the future. The response I got was brief and cold. Nowhere close to the warm and engaging responses from earlier. Did I say something wrong? We agreed to the truth and the truth is what I always gave. I emailed back apologizing if something I said came across poorly. Sending emails or texts always leaves the connotation of a statement up for interpretation. Another cold and almost insulting response came to my inbox. I don't want to pour salt on the wound but leaving it so awkwardly makes me feel uncomfortable.
What do you do when it's suddenly different?
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